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Hard Boiled | Audio
By Melanie Rees
Melanie Rees is an environmental consultant and spends much of her time playing in wetlands seldom wet. She has also held jobs playing in dirt, playing with fish and playing in treetops. When she is not up a tree or stuck in the mud, she writes speculative fiction. Her stories have been published in various magazines and anthologies including Andomeda Spaceways Inflight Magazine, The Future Fire, Abandoned Towers and Twisted Tongue. She lives online at and in the real world lives in South Australia in a house made of straw.
       A mother's guide to boiling an egg in five easy steps.
       Step 1: Bring a pan of water to the boil.
       Step 2: Find a pair of earmuffs to block out the persistent wails of your five-year-old son who is demanding Fruit Loops for breakfast.
       Step 3: Find the egg timer and discover your toddler has spilt chocolate milk over the device, and it no longer works.
       Step 4: Turn your back for five seconds and find egg yolk and shell splattered on the wall and your ten-year-old standing nearby with a cheeky grin.
       Step 5: Decide boiling eggs is too difficult and promise never to cook an egg again and get your tubes tied.
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